Looking in

 Sometimes I am in a dream world,

Lost and dissociated,

Away from this world. 

Always feeling at odds,

Never stop questioning,

Whether I am doing it right.

All alone in this world,

At times I want to self-destruct,

Alternatively, I want to hide away.

Autism is so lonely,

Even though there is plenty

Like me trying to survive

In this neurotypical world.

No one can see my tears,

On the outside all alone 

Looking in. 

Never a day goes bye 

Where I dealt with myself,

It leads me to a meltdown,

All the while seeking perfection.

I get so frustrated,

Constantly feeling like it is 

Out of reach.

No one bothers,

They don't see my tears,

The words get stuck and 

Lost along the way. 

If only they knew how 

Isolated I feel.